Deep breaths. Calm, zen, serene. Today is the first day of the rest of my---
MOMMYMOMMYMOMMYMOMMY
[singsong voice] Yes, my love?
Can you open this? Can you open this? Can you open this? [all without taking a breath or pausing]
Okay. There you go.
Deep breaths. I am a tree, swayin--
Mooooooom?
[normal voice, still calm] Yes?
Can I have some candy?
You just had breakfast less than 5 minutes ago. No.
WHYYYYYY? WHYYYYY?
You know why. You just ate. Ask me again after lunch.
Calm, zen, I am filled with love....
MOMMY?
I'm in here!
Mommy?
I'm in daddy's office!
Mommy???
I'M IN DADDY'S OFFICE!!!
MOMMY??
DADDY'S OFFICE!!!!
[appears in doorway] Mom!
[through clenched teeth] What?
Um, um, do you know blue fan is?
[momentarily confused, then remembering said fan is broken] I dunno.
Can I work on computer?
Yes, you can use the one in the playroom.
Playroom?
Yes.
You use computer?
Yes.
Oh. [leaves]
I think it's time to consult Dr. Pepper. The Budweiser Institute is closed until 8 pm tonight.
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Oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beautiful day.....lol! I'll trade you for one hour an overenergeticdomesticatedtodochoresaroundthehouse... husband (who thinks everyone should be as enthusiastic for a one child...naw...that would be cruel.....
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