Friday, January 22, 2010

Kryptonite

Okay, so I have too much time on my hands during my daily commute.  Today's topic:  why do cars have an erotic fascination?  I mean, it's one thing to say that chicks dig a dude in a hot car purely because said dude probably has a lot of money and can show one a good time.  It's quite another to explain a visceral reaction to the car itself.  I think I can understand a little better why guys -- or anyone, for that matter -- can get so into particular models of cars.  Something speaks to you.  I just don't understand what it is.  It's just a collection of metal (and fiberglass and plastic) parts stuck together.  What's the big deal?

But it's there.  My first love was the classic 60's Mustang.  Trite, true, but man that's one fine car.  I have to sheepishly admit that I dated one guy far longer than I would have otherwise just because he had one.  Yellow, with a black rag top.  That was a great car.  My current obsession is the Dodge Charger.  Not that sexy of a car, in the stereotypical muscle car type of way, but there's something about it that makes me want to hit the mountain roads, window down and music pumping.

Which leads me to say that I think I've hit upon the recipe for my own personal Kryptonite.  DH, if you were to pose casually against a Dodge Charger, dab the scent of freshly drying laundry behind each ear and engage in witty banter, I don't think I could resist.  Especially if there are brownies there too.  Just sayin'.

- The TMI Queen

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Children's Books

Some of my favorite lines/sentences from children's books:

"And he thought and thought and thought about them."
- Snowy Day by Jack Ezra Keats

"It's awful how often their poogles get broken."
- Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are by Dr. Seuss

"Today is gone, today was fun, tomorrow is another one."
- One Fish Two Fish by Dr. Seuss

I'm sure there are others.  These are the ones that come to mind.  Any favorites of yours?

Sunday, January 17, 2010

The True Meaning of MLK Day

We're sitting at the table eating lunch today, when I ask DD what, if anything, she learned about Martin Luther King at school last week.  I hadn't even thought about it until a friend with a kindergartener at another school asked what our kid had learned.  So I asked, and she told us they listened to/watched his famous "I Have a Dream" speech.  And we're chatting away (okay, so I'm droning on) about MLK and what he did and how he did it, etc.

All of a sudden DS decides to wade into the mix and starts yelling "It's my turn to talk!  It's my turn to talk!"  So once DD ends her sentence, I turn to DS and say, "Okay, buddy.  What do you want to say?"

"Um, King pokes me in my sleep."
"What?"
"King comes when I'm dreaming and pokes me.  He gonna poke me in my dreams."

Huh.  Interesting interpretation of "I Have a Dream."  What do you say to that?  I got nothing.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Fun with Spam

Today's best offer (so far):

"Heal for your woody!  Explore the passion ocean."

How lyrical; terse yet expressive.  I give this a 4.5 out 5.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

By Request

This post is being written upon the request of a friend who insists that I need to post something, already.

It's a common conversation.  You're sitting around with friends, shooting the breeze, and you talk about some movie you loved, or something funny you read, and invariably someone will make a comment about how "yummy" some actor or actress is, or "hott."  Many of my friends have discovered over the years that my list of attractive actors is... eclectic.

What I have to say up front is that, to me, there is a very distinct difference between physical and intellectual attraction.  In the very best circumstances, those two overlap very strongly (hey, DH von sexy pants), but I think we all have had the experience of finding just the one or the other to be true, or to feel a stronger pull to one more than the other for any particular person.

I feel that I have to defend -- or explain? -- my preferences further by saying that I find odd, weird, quirky and silly to be great attractors in just about anything (books, music, movies, underpants, etc.).  Richard Gere is considered to be "hunky" by most but to me he is very vanilla.  George Clooney and Brad Pitt only barely get in under the wire not because of their looks (okay, for Clooney partly because of his looks) but because they are willing to be in quirky movies like Burn After Reading or O Brother Where Art Thou.  You can buy pecs and shiny white teeth, and Hollywood is full of "beautiful" people.

All this painfully long intro will, I hope, further explain the following list of attractive actors:

1.  Alan Rickman (no, not Snape; see Die Hard as reference)
2.  Steve Martin (in this case, pure intellectual attraction; if I could ever make him laugh, I'd probably drop dead on the spot of sheer happiness)
3.  Rowan Atkinson (okay, I've taken a lot of heat on this one in the past -- not Mr. Bean, people, I'm talking Black Adder; witty sarcastic repartee is one of the best aphrodisiacs, IMO)
4.  Christopher Walken (the man can dance, after all)
5.  Eddie Izzard (oddly barrel-shaped, "Action Transvestite," but still... he has a flag)

I'm sure there are others, and I'm sure that my friends that read this post will be happy to remind me of any particularly odd preferences I've voiced in the past.

What is true -- whether you read it as cute or tragic or implausible -- is that it doesn't matter if I find them attractive or not, ultimately.  I love my husband so deeply that in an idle moment where I might think of being physically romantic with anyone, it is DH -- arms and lips, hands and legs, eyes -- that I see.  Schmaltzy?  Lucky?  All of the above.